The good girl

I was reading a blog today titled Life Lessons. You know the kind, graduation speeches, everything I ever needed to know I learned in Kindergarten, etc. Later while I was shopping I recalled one of the little lessons I’ve learned. Wear sexy panties.

I live in the same small town where I grew up. My father is well known throughout this small town. After the annual Labor Day parade, back when I was in high school, I ended up riding on the hood of my friend’s car, I think I was flirting with the guy behind the wheel, started to strike a pose on his hood and he moved the car. Anyway, it was a silly thing to do, everyone laughed and I didn’t think about it again until a week or so later. Dad asked me about it and explained, “What you did doesn’t bother me but honey, people saw you.”

I learned very quickly that I had an image. And the image I wanted was that of the good girl. I spent a lifetime working on that image. I hung out with the right kids in high school. I went to a very conservative Christian college. And if I’m honest with myself it’s why I tried so hard for so long to hang on to my marriage. I didn’t want to be divorced, it didn’t fit my image.

I know I’ve said it before but in my small town it doesn’t matter that I don’t know someone, they may know me. At Grace’s first softball practice I was talking to one of the other mothers and she called me by name. I kind of looked at her and finally she said, “you are Mr. Politician’s daughter right?” That isn’t an isolated incident. For the most part I like the image I show to the world. But there is more to me.

A few years ago I started wearing sexy panties. I won’t pretend it will cure all that ills you, but it helps. It doesn’t matter that no one will see them. I know they are there. They are a confidence boost. On the outside I am Mr. Politician’s daughter, mother of four, church secretary, all around good girl. But underneath there I am flirtatious. What am I wearing today? Well I’m already blushing and my brother is probably going to read this. But they are one of my favorites, seriously.